The 1999 What Color Is Your Parachute?

Richard Nelson Bolles

ISBN 1-58008-008-1, paperback

Started: 1999 December 17

Finished: 1999 April, but will be used for reference for a while more

Reviewed: 1999 May 8

On December 14, Larry (the boss) called me in for private consultation. My project, delivery of hardware and software GPS receiver to the SRTM project was in serious trouble. The last possible date to deliver was tomorrow and we were nowhere close. He was "thinking of making changes" and thought he might put Jeff S. in charge of the software part of the project. This made me angry. I had been begging Larry for some months to use his supervisory authority to make Jeff perform his technical work which was critical to my and everybody else's delivery, but neither would he do this nor would Jeff curtail any of his self-promotion to do his actual job. Now he was in a position of saying, in essence, "my inferior colleague is in trouble but I will magnanimously step in and, at some slight sacrifice to my own goals and needs, help out." Clearly, in retrospect, this was just some check-off item in Jeff's climb to some great new recognition for this year's evaluation game.

Well, whatever. I looked at Larry, angrily and said, "Yes, this is probably the only way to get him to do his part of the job. I will be cooperative, but there will be consequences."

That night, I worked on my resume, started thinking of connections I had and prepared to do a cold mailing of 200-300 of them soon, perhaps during the holiday period. I looked through the academic want-ads in the back of Spectrum and saw some that were kind of interesting. To follow up on this, I called Dr. Dave Shattuck for advice and he said, after about 20 minutes, "Of course you've done the latest Parachute... or something like that?" "No, what's that?" was my reply. As soon as we hung up, I got on amazon.com to order the book, then left with nothing to do but wait, so took the unusual step to get in the car and drive right to the local bookstore to buy a copy and then, with it in hand, canceled the amazon.com order. Before I went to sleep that night I was already through more than the first chapter and was doing early exercises.

Bolles is an Episcopalian Rector who has found his life's work: helping other people find theirs. He even talks about the notions of "mission" and "calling" from a Christian perspective in one of the Appendices with the caveat that he does not mean to be exclusive but that the reader should just interpret his advice into the language of their own religion, that it was most meaningful to make the discussion in the language of his which would be concrete and meaningful.

Parachute... basically is a guide to “know thyself” in terms of profession. (It is also recommended by Your Money or Your Life.) Through many exercises, writing stories about yourself, asking others to look at information you have worked out and comment on it, use of a left-brained "prioritization grid," and other techniques, the reader is able to come to some conclusions about what he/she should be doing for a living, in what environment they should be doing it, and to what end. "What, Where, and How" are the questions asked and answered.

The job search can be demoralizing, slow, and depressing especially when done under great pressure. He advises strongly and conversationally against many of the biggest pitfalls and against the proclivity to skip steps or to not put yourself out there and get the kinds of help you need. I did the exercises thoroughly, talked to friends in person, on the radio, on the telephone, and on e-mail about various parts of them, kept a huge folder of notes, and finally came up with the What? and Where? answers and a resume to match. The months of the work have been difficult. Work has been very demanding, there has been considerable overtime. All of my spare time at home not spent doing routine upkeep (bill paying, going to kid performances, church, etc.) was spent doing this, sometimes until late at night. Some of the exercises took days, particularly one that I adapted from the prioritization grid to answer an even bigger set of questions.

Viann and I realized that a job change for me combined with one already in progress for her (she gave notice in September and quit April 14 but still goes in part time) meant an opportunity to pull up and move back to Texas. We discussed the many facets of this with the kids who were agreeable except for Viannah. I concentrated much of my research on possibilities in Texas and found some good ones. In February, we conducted two family meetings, one on the 21st to put all the information on the table, and another on the 28th to "decide" whether to go or stay. We prayed, shouted, cried. God seemed to be leading us to stay, but the kids thought otherwise and in general we weren't sure. God, perhaps was not speaking at all. I was mad, Viann was mad. Our relationship was damaged for months; it is only now getting back to something like normal and there are new sets of issues that we have to stay clear of or deal with gently even still, at least until after the "final resolution" for the coming five years. We visited my old therapist, Richard Blackmon, for help.

Now I'm at the resume/application stage. I'm staying at JPL in Mars Sample Return perhaps, or going to Southwest Research Institute in San Antonio which has a division that does JPL-like work, or going to Raytheon/Garland where a big government contract has just been won. Don't know where or what beyond that. I'm sitting by the telephone.

But this is more my story than the story of the book. The prior paragraph was to discuss the 25 element matrix about go/stay options. I spent several days in prayer and meditation filling out the 300 issue comparisons on that, then tried to make sense of the results looking for a good reason to go or stay. Statistically, there was none. Moving is a big headache. Staying means facing Jeff indefinitely, even in a different organization at JPL. (His latest self-promotion is to get a big Mars job for our group/section.) I cannot say what will happen.

I found Parachute... particularly educational and helpful. Now I only need the guts to follow through on what I have learned about myself amidst many projecting voices from outside. This edition is significantly compacted but even so, many avenues, like self-employment are diversions from my own path. They show completeness of the volume and why it is so thick. The "My Flower" Appendix was particularly helpful, and also quite draining. I followed up on some references in the local public library.

Most of it was fun. Most of it was hard. Everybody enjoys talking and thinking about themselves, but all the introspection (and "extra-spection" by others) in this book is a lot of work. I'm burned out, tired of not "doing my own thing" at all, and glad it's nearly over.

As with Your Money... I've also recommended this to Wilda and would also to anyone else with a need who looked ready to follow through in this way. Viann's friend Katheryn Dillon and Michael's latest friend Mary Korman are big fans of the book. Katheryn came to lunch with me one day and we discussed life, work and some of my exercises. This was helpful. I may go through some of it with Viann sometime if she wants to get back into the work force, somewhere else. This doesn't sound very appealing just now though (either the book or Viann working).

A compass for choices made day to day: Does this increase gratitude? kindness? forgiveness? honesty? love? I wrote this down separately in order to refer to it. It could be from the Bible, indeed, in a composite sense, it is.

Doing this book, and Your Money or Your Life and Experiencing God all at once has been too much. Like the joke about saving money, "If I get any more self help, I won't be able to stand it!" Still, in terms of convincing me how valuable I can really be in the right place and for some excellent advice that goes against my own instincts or conventional wisdom (i.e. Never just look at one place at a time...) it has been well worth it.